Lost, Insecured, Hurt

Im in hawaii now....yes there is a hurricane, but ill be okay.
first things first, im here for college, HPU(hawaii pacific university), but i checked it out, downtown campus and the campus uphill, they dont look like a traditional school, its like a tuition center in downtown where my classes will be at and its worst than singapore orchard road. its old houses and towns and no shopping places. i want to study in an environment that i could excel in studies and also enjoy myself and have fun at the same time. this is not it. dont look like it. i took a gander at the other only university in hawaii, UOH(university of hawaii). its a traditional school alright, the campus is like 10 times of my old high school, guess whats the enrollment number?

FREAKING 25,000!!!!!!! number of students in that freaking school!!!!! its like let say.......those that know will know, 10-12 times of RSS maybe even more, oh ya the campus is HUGE!!!!!!!

now thats a traditional school alright, but too old and TOO big for me, aint my type. the shopping mall here are so bad they only sell shits for tourist pretty much, so theres nothing for me to buy and nothing for me to shop.but still, i dont really have a feel for it here.....

i dunno why....the longer i stay here the more i miss, miss everything....what use to be the best time in my life, i miss her, i miss my friends, i miss the innocent times in singapore.....but now...its all about my future and my career.....

i got couple choices.....

1) stay here and fight through what ever comes in my way but maybe regret about it for 4 years straight (that i can do)

2) stay here and fight through what ever comes in my way but maybe regret about it for 2 years and than decide to transfer to UOH or UNLV(university of las vegas)

3) move back to california and study junior college for 2 years than come back to hawaii with shit loads of cash and shit loads of college credits and finished all the general ed ready to go into my major and not regret it cause im feeling of doing it.

4) move back to california and study junior college for 2 years and than move to las vegas with shit loads of cash and shit loads of college credits and ready to work in a hotel or a casino with experience and get out there with a hotel management bachelors degree or a BA for TIM(Travel Industry Mangement)

i like 4 the most.......i dunno....iv done so much this past 3 years..everything pointed here to hawaii.......i even missed my flight at 8.55a.m to hawaii yesterday but than WOW there is another flight at 9.55a.m so we only waited like 30 minutes.....i dont believe it.......its creepy even....i didnt get into any other university other than here....creepy too.....everything seems like it was destiny.....but i dont know why god lead me till here......why? i dont know....i thought i would feel alot closer to home(singapore) here but i feel even more distance......

i never liked changes, if i do choose to stay here, ill have to build everything from the beginning again like i did 3 years ago except this time, im alone, i hate to say this, but im a little scared........really.......not walking around here only thing keeping my moving and still hanging around is her....all i think of is her.....she is what makes me strong......i cant make it through without her.....but now....

im confused......lost.......hurt.....scared.......please someone tell me what do. ill leave the choice to you....help me make my choice......dont tell me to do what ever i want to do, or do what my heart tells me to do cause my heart......is lost.....in this world........